Letter to Kristina

Dear Kristy,
Ok, so I already told you about the first night Emily and I were together. What an amazing connection! Oh, I wish words could express exactly just what happened. It was like the planets aligned and the moon was full and something in us just wanted to reach out and attach to each other. Hence our lips connected and our hearts began to beat as one, so it seemed. And I had never ever spent the night with a girl so that made it all the more extraordinary. I’m one for experience, so long as it is fun. Experiences can either be bad or good for me and I usually don’t regret them, because you learn so much from them. This one was beyond reality. It seemed like a dream almost…or maybe it was her lime green and sky blue colored light bulbs above us, but either way, my eyes were open. It seemed like everything was changing for the better. And it did. I have never been this happy in my whole entire life I guess. At least, I can’t remember a time when I was absolutely speechless with my emotions yet the person that I felt for could understand each and every palpitation of my heart. Let me describe her for you since I already told you that she is a tall blondie…lol. Natural blonde too…like real blonde…you get it right? So, besides beautiful looks befitting to her personality, she has the best free-spirited, live-to-love life attitude just like me…well, except for that I have a stupid 2 o clock curfew that I voluntarily follow. She loves to talk about everything and anything, she loves her Honda (huge turn on…she has a system for god sakes…lol), and she has a heart. It’s hard to find a girl with a heart it seems…one who can feel something and actually know what it means. There are way too many ways to feel something and some people just grab out into open air to find a feeling without knowing truly what they are saying or doing. It helps that we both were in serious relationships before this one, on top of the fact that we both played the sane roles of the two. There again plays out the whole experience concept. She really sees me for who I am. I told you how everyone thought I was this big sex freak and all I could think about was getting some or hitting on the girls. Well, even though I am a flirty guy, she saw past that and found out who I really was: just a guy looking for the right person to connect with. And it’s funny, every girl at work I would make up this elaborate story that would ultimately lead to the girl leaving her arrogant stuck up attitude behind in order to fall in love with me, or something stupid like that. But I guess you just have to let things happen, let life hit you like it may. Suffer the bad, and indulge with the good, never keeping your eyes off of the things that you have.
I went off on a thought tangent. Sorry, lol. So, after the first night, I just didn’t wanna keep away from her. There was just so more to experience and a lot more to learn about her. I truly learned a lot about her in such a short time too. Its crazy. So day after day, night after night, we spent together when we didn’t have school or work. And the nature of our attraction for one another kept us together even during times when I should have been studying or doing a project. And I thought I would regret it, but really, I didn’t. It isn’t possible to regret something that has 1) already happened and 2) makes you smile constantly. I can remember our next date after the first one when we went to Oviedo mall and I showed her the sights around the marketplace. It was deader than a piece of well-done steak (like that? Lol) all around the place, but we just kept walking and talking, observing and relaxing. We were supposed to be looking for work shirts, but when it actually got to that, I couldn’t even focus enough to realize that the one shirt that I did buy was the wrong one. But I didn’t care a bit…not for a second, because the two of us were cheeeeeeezin, which is her terminology for smiling a lot. I love her words too…everything she has a word for seems to describe it in the utmost detail possible. Cheezin just captures our smiles perfectly. So we went to experience the fine dining of Chili’s, which is her favorite place in the whole world to eat…they have good Honey Mustard which she is an addict to, and cheesy Broccoli and Cheese soup (which they ran out of, but we ended getting some the next time we went…its good). But it was like a normal date, really getting to know each other although we knew so much already. Then my favorite part was when we got back in the car. Kiss, after gentle kiss, after caressing kiss, after absorbed glance, after loving touch, after silky soft kiss. We breathed in and out upon the same breath, taking each other’s away but still able to survive without the surplus of carbon dioxide at our disposal. That was truly a beautiful thing, she is truly a beautiful thing. And the most memorable thing about that experience was the way the moonlight or the street lights across the street (whichever it was, I didn’t care, but it might as well have been the starlight) illuminated her beautiful blue eyes into the intricate pattern of a bright glowing star that shone into my heart and tickled every nerve in my body. I fell quite hard for this girl right away, yet I didn’t want to say it because I was too into falling softly into her kiss. But we felt the same exact thing. Later that night, we retreated back to her place and lay next to each other kissing just as before. After a couple of hours of being all over and into each other, somehow our words met our emotions and the truth came out. I can’t describe it because you probably wouldn’t understand, but it would probably sound something like “This is crazy” or “You make me weak” followed by a large amount of breathing, kissing and such. That night, we connected way past the moon and the stars…we floated way above the clouds and the midnight sky. We were just on the same letter of the same page again. Yet the page would read gibberish to anyone who attempted to interpret it. Shocking, we had only been together for a bit more than two weeks, but we took that electricity and applied it in the most unique way. I hesitate to call it love because it just doesn’t apply the correct definition, but that’s the only word in the human dialect that can get even near it. Love at first glance? Maybe love at first kiss? Love connection? The less you try to explain it, the easier it is to understand I think. It’s just plain crazy!
Every chance I got, she would have me over at 7 in the morning on Tuesdays usually to come and sleep with her until 12 or so and cuddle. How awesome? Then we would go and get something to eat and do something afterwards. And almost every night after work we are together either watching a movie, just chilling or doing something fun…oh, or kissing and other “passionate” things. And I think that’s what ultimately led me to just give into it…because she is so passionate. I can feel her heartbeat close to mine when we kiss, I can see into her soul when we look into each other’s eyes, and it feels way too perfect not to. And we took a shower together in a black light…that was hot! Everything was glowing…not neglecting our smiles. That’s some fun shit…I would recommend that one day, you do that. Now there’s an experience for anyone. She and I think so similarly and so intelligently together. We call each other geeks a lot just by the fact that we are always thinking of…well, geeky stuff I guess.
I hope that this got somewhat close to explaining this girl of mine. It really doesn’t touch the surface as much as I wish it did, but you would have to be me to understand and feel the same things. It exists beyond reason and rationality, and that makes it all the more magnificent.

Josh